Well last night I went out with some friends and drank.. dont even know how many calories I consumed by I always get the lowest caloric drink... a vodka tonic with lime... that is low cal right? Maybe I should switch to diet cola and rum? Thoughts?
But of course when I'm drunk I loose control and I went to this pizza shop and bought a panino with ham and lettuce and I dont even remember what else.. ugh. I was doing so well the rest of the day I had my split pea soup and some boiled beans with soya sauce. What a waste.
Today I met my friends parents who are visiting Rome for 10 days. I've been showing them around the city, places to go and eat and what not. I was planning on fasting today to make up for last nights indulgence but I had to eat something at lunch with them. I ordered a vegetable soup and ate half of it. But then I spent about 5.5 hours walking around the city showing them everything so hopefully that helped burn it off. We went for a drink near the Pantheon in the evening but I just got an espresso instead of a high calorie wine or beer and man I forgot how good it feels to be running on empty with caffeine in your system. I really have that cocaine-splurge type of high feeling. God is it ever good. I felt so good that i walked clear across town all the way to my house which took 45 mins even at a brisk pace! yay for burning calories!! It's 8 40 pm now though and I'm going to tell the family I ate out, so it's all perfect! Just water until bed time, pop in a thinspo movie and wake up a bit thinner than today.
I love that feeling of waking up empty, where when you get out of bed the room spins for a second and you smile to yourself that you made it another day on track, and you can make it one more. No one will ever know. Things will be perfect. I love looking in the mirror, holding up my shirt and watching my waist get smaller and smaller, and seeing more of my ribs. I love when I go to the bathroom I can see my thighs getting more narrow. I love hearing my stomach grumble and think that I am defying even my own body. I am that powerful. My body does not own or control me. I decide what it gets to do. And I've decided that it is going to be pure perfection.
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